When my wife Katy and I got married, building a life that was safe and healthy to raise a family was of the utmost important to us.  Living green has been a lifelong practice that really flourished as our family grew.  Our number one priority has been to raise a happy family and create a healthy environment for us, as well as, our surrounding community of Manhattan Beach, CA.

We are often asked, “What can I do to live a green lifestyle?”  The answer is simple, if everyone would make small changes in their everyday lives, it could make a significant impact on the strain for resources in their local communities.  Katy and I have compiled a list of some simple ways we all can contribute to making a smaller footprint.

1.  Reduce Water Consumption– There are several ways families can reduce their water consumption.

• Take showers instead of baths. Newer higher efficiency showerheads provide good water pressure and use less water than filling a bath tub.
• Shorten Shower time. Less time in the shower saves up to 5 gallons of water per minute you cut from shower time.
• Use high efficiency toilets. Over the past several years manufacturers have worked to make toilets more water efficient and bacteria-resistant which makes them easier to clean.
• Xeriscape – Be thoughtful in your landscaping choices. Utilize plants and grasses that are drought tolerant. Reduce water consumption and garden maintenance simultaneously.
• Plant trees for shade. Not only will the shade help reduce cooling costs, it will also increase property values when the trees mature.

2.  Use Natural Cleaning Products– Natural cleaning products are readily available at most super markets. They clean, disinfect and deodorize the same way conventional cleaning products do without harmful chemicals. Read labels before you purchase, natural ingredients include baking soda, borax, cornstarch, lemon juice, mineral oil, vinegar and washing soda. If you choose to make your own, add essential oils for fragrance.

3.  Maximize Solar Power– Consider installing solar panels to heat and cool your home. Solar panels will reduce energy levels and benefit your entire community by reducing energy consumption at the local power plant.

4.  Preserve Air Quality– Use eco-friendly paints the next time you update a room in your house. Eco-friendly paints have very low levels of Volatile Organic Compounds (VOC) and come in a wide array of colors.

5.  Reduce Utility Consumption– Upgrade to a high quality air filtering system. By providing better air ventilation and exhaust in your home you will have cleaner air to breathe while reducing strain your community’s electric and gas consumption.

6.  Buy Natural and Organic Products– When making purchases for furniture and bedding choose organic products made from sustainable materials like unbleached wool, bamboo, or natural plant fibers. Using eco-friendly furniture is an excellent way to detox your home. Organic mattresses made from wool or natural latex and have been shown to reduce allergens in the air.

7.  Use Re-usable Containers– Rather than using foil or plastic wrap; try using re-usable storage containers for leftovers or lunches. Consider taking a coffee mug to work instead of using Styrofoam cups. Not only will you save money, you will also reduce items that sit in a landfill for years decomposing.

8.  Eat Clean– More processing equals less nutrient density in foods. Focus on buying fresh organic fruits and vegetables. Reduce the amount of processed foods in your diet. Eating clean will improve your health and cut down on landfill items by cutting out cans, glass and plastics in your trash.

9.  Conduct an Energy Audit– Discover where you have leaks and plug them up. Inefficient windows and doors can cost a lot in utility bills in the winter. If you still feel drafts, hire a professional auditor through the Department of Energy’s Energy Saver site. They can make excellent recommendations to make your home weather tight.

10.  Recycle– Most major cities offer free recycling as part of weekly trash removal programs. Take advantage of the service and sort through glass, plastic, aluminum and paper. Quarterly go through closets and drawers and find clothes the kids have outgrown or that you simply don’t wear anymore and donate to a thrift store or homeless shelter. Items that are gently used can benefit others in your community.

Living a green lifestyle is a conscious choice we made for our family, and we can attest to the fact that the benefits far outweigh the planning it takes.  We would like to encourage you to join us in adopting a green lifestyle for your family.  You will be amazed at the difference it will make in your lives and in your local community.

Good luck and happy parenting!

Daddy Nickell

The Nickells’ practice what they preach as they are in the process of building an eco- friendly home that is on track to receive Platinum LEED certification from the U.S. Green Building Council.

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddy & Co., delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the Daddy & Co. blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post 10 Tips for Greener Living appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

Every child has to learn how to be a good sport, and in turn, a good loser. Whether your child is playing a team sport like soccer or a board game at home there will come a time when they don’t win. And how they handle that loss will be extremely important. With seven children of my own ranging in age from 1 year to 27 years old, I’ve learned my fair share about sportsmanship over the years.

Here are my tips for raising a child who is a team player and a good sport when faced with a loss.

Do Your Best: Teach your child that his best is plenty good enough, and that instead of trying to always win, he should instead focus on trying to do his best and trying to improve each and every time he plays a game. Often too much emphasis is put on the win, when it should be spread out. We need more emphasis on: building each other up, being patient, playing as a team, working hard, being supportive, improving, etc. As parents we can work to switch the emphasis from “the win” to all of the other wonderful things that are learned through games and sports. 

Discussing the Loss: When your child loses a game, discuss it with them and let them know it’s okay to lose some; nobody wins every game they play. Share stories of your own losses and how you handled those difficulties in your life. Discuss ways in which you learned to be a good sport. Encourage your child to talk about their own goals, how they’ve improved over time, what they did well in any certain game and more. I believe in an open line of communication between parents and children; you’ll be able to share your own wisdom, and you’ll likely be surprised by what your children tell you, too.

Rewarding a Positive Attitude: As your child learns to be a good sport it’ll be important to reward their positive attitude – when they have one. Don’t let an opportunity go by for you to genuinely let your child know you’re proud of them. And when your child gracefully loses a game while being kind and supportive to their teammates, that would likely be one of those times. Tell your child you’re proud and let them know exactly why; then reward them by letting them choose dessert or pick a weekend activity for the family.

Consequences for Unsportsmanlike Conduct: On the other hand, there will probably be times when your child loses a game and behaves in an unsportsmanlike manner. Or there might be a time when your child is rude to a teammate or to another team. This behavior might merit a consequence. After the consequence is delivered and your child cools off, I recommend talking to the child about their behavior in detail. Ask them to come up with alternative methods for handling such a situation in the future.

Games and sports teach us a lot about life, and therefore teaching children to be good sports is invaluable but also difficult. I hope these tips will help your family as they’ve helped mine in the past. 

Happy parenting!

Sincerely,

Daddy

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Teaching Good Sportsmanship appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

As a father of seven, I’ve had my fair share of holiday shopping with kids.  It’s never an easy thing, but during the holidays it’s a lot more difficult.  This time of year, you need to be extra careful and pay extra close attention.  The stores are busy and you’re likely trying to manage extra baggage such as coats and shopping bags plus the kids.

Here are a few tips for staying safe when holiday shopping with kids and babies:

1. Use a cart or stroller whenever possible. Contained children are the easiest to manage.  A stroller also gives you a place to stash your purchases.

2. Supervise bathroom visits. It’s very easy to get separated or have a stranger approach your child in a busy public bathroom.

3. Select oversized fitting rooms and bring your children inside with you.

5. Malls and parking lots are extra busy and dangerous during the holidays. Be sure to hold your child’s hand in parking lots and watch out for drivers who are not looking for pedestrians.

6. Remind your children not talk to strangers.

7. Make sure your child knows they must not act in an ill-mannered way by knocking things off the shelves or breaking anything. Also discourage them from going under the clothing racks as it’s dangerous and easy to lose them.

8. Wear your baby in a carrier, if possible, as you will be hands-free while knowing your little one is in a safe place.

9. Dress your children up in identical and easily noticeable clothing, such as tie-dye or bright colored t-shirts. In the event that your little one runs off, you will be able to show the security guards exactly what outfit he or she is wearing by referencing your other child’s outfit. 

10. Put a sticker on each child’s shirt listing your name and cell phone number in the event you get separated.  Have an “action plan” in place for what they are supposed to do if you get separated such as going into a store and asking a salesperson for help, finding the courtesy counter, finding a security guard, etc.).

11. Establish these rules in a quiet place ahead of time, so that your child knows what is expected of him once you’re inside the busy stores.

12. Shopping is not a lot of fun for little ones.  If you’re asking for their cooperation and patience, offer up a small reward if they are good such as a hot chocolate afterwards or visiting Santa. 

Good luck & happy parenting!        

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Tips for Safe Holiday Shopping with Kids appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

Peer pressure can start at a young age and often begins simply and seemingly harmless, but it shouldn’t be taken lightly. Parents need to work with their young children to teach them ways in which they can resist peer pressure.

With seven kids of my own, I’ve dealt with my fair share of it and I’ve also discovered several great ways to handle it.

Be Yourself: Children often succumb to peer pressure because they’re afraid to say no or to be themselves. We need to teach children that’s it’s perfectly okay to be different; we all don’t need to fit into one mold. When a child is comfortable in their own skin they’ll be more prepared to resist peer pressure. It’s not easy to teach a child that it’s okay to be different or to go against the grain, and it’s really a lesson that you’ll have to continue to teach as your child grows and encounters new difficulties and life experiences. Make sure your child knows you think the world of them and that you’re proud to be their parent; building them up will instill confidence, which will help them understand that they don’t need to change who they are to “fit in” or “be cool”.

Reflect Often: Another important lesson parents need to teach children is to be reflective and to not make rash or rushed decisions. A reflective child will be less likely to be peer pressured into doing something risky or irresponsible, because they’ll take the time to weigh the pros and cons and seriously think about the best option or decision. Start young by discussing aloud with your child pros and cons of various and everyday activities, so they get into the habit of thinking things through. Instilling a sense of reflection can do wonders when it comes to helping children resist peer pressure.

Set a Good Example: I say it all the time, and I’ll say it again now: your kids are watching and learning from your every move. If you’re peer pressured into doing something you didn’t necessarily want to do they’ll be watching you and learning that it’s okay to succumb to peer pressure. Set a strong example, be a good role model and show your children that saying no in the face of peer pressure is perfectly acceptable.

Communicate: Solid communication between parent and child is extremely important. A relationship rich in communication will allow a parent to better understand their child. Furthermore, a child will likely be more open about any peer pressures they may be facing if they’re given the opportunity to express themselves freely and safely. The parent will then be able to step in and give their child techniques to resist peer pressure.

Teaching ways to resist peer pressure should begin at a young age and continue on through childhood. Start small and don’t give up!

Happy parenting!

Sincerely,

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Teaching Kids to Resist Peer Pressure appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

As a seasoned traveler and dad to 7, I know how stressful it can be to fly with toddlers. Don’t get caught up in the stress this year, follow these tried and true tips for ensuring easy travel with your toddlers this winter and beyond.  

Planning Ahead for Toddlers:

• Buy some books about flying in a plane so that your child will understand the whole concept. You might also buy a toy plane that you can talk about with your toddler. Discuss the people who work on the plane, where you enter the plane, where you sit on a plane, etc. The goal here is to get children used to the idea of flying.
• Get a backpack or special travel bag that is just for the toddler, and beginning a few weeks in advance discuss how the child can help pack their bag.  Talk about what items they’d like to bring with them to play with on the plane.
• Discuss with your child all the steps that come with flying on an airplane, such as: the ride to airport, checking bags, going through TSA, waiting to board, getting on the plane, looking out the window, etc. Then they’ll know what to expect when you arrive at the airport on travel day.

Plan in 15 Minutes: 

Estimate the time and length of the trip from beginning to end and make plans in 15 minute increments.  For instance, if you’re planning for a 5 hour flight you’ll know:

• The first 30 minutes your toddlers will be excited as they will have just boarded the plane; they’ll be looking out the window, watching the activity, seeing other planes, and watching luggage being loaded. Then you have the exciting take off to look forward to, too.
• Once the plane passes through the clouds, the show is over for the child and it’ll be time to start to calculate how to entertain your toddler for the remaining 4.5 hours left in the flight.
• You’ll want about 16 different 15-minute activities with some backups in mind, too, that will keep your toddler entertained throughout a long flight. My suggestions include the following:
• Start with a book – while they are still excited to fly.
• Bring a favorite toy – doll or action figure.
• Play dough is always a good item to have on-hand.
• Scotch tape can actually be quite entertaining.
• Don’t forget to factor in snack time – bring a good assortment.
• You can add 15 minutes for a trip to the bathroom or a diaper change.
• Get out of your seats (if the seatbelt sign is off) and walk around the plane.
• Coloring book and crayons are definite staples.
• Change seats with each other to get a fresh view of the surroundings.
• Talk to the seat neighbors if they’re friendly.
• Bring some toy-cars, or play items that allow for imaginary play.
• Bring some magnetic blocks, or other creative building toys

What to Expect as the Parent:

• You might want your child to nap on the plane, but you need to be prepared because that won’t always happen.   
• Parents should remain calm, and listen to the child’s excitements and fears.
• Make each activity last as long as possible. Take a diaper change, for example, walk slowly and explore on the way there and on the way back.
• Don’t rely on the airplane for a meal. Pack plenty of food for your child.
• Do not even think about yourself; consider yourself lucky if you get to glance at a magazine or close your eyes for a few seconds.
• Try to avoid taking out your computer unless your child is napping.
• Always have a “Def Con 5” item at your fingertips. What I call the Def Con 5 item is a toy you can pull out when your child is reaching melt down mode, and you still have 30 minutes trapped inside a plane.
• I try to keep the iPad hidden as a last resort, and not as a first choice item. I’ve used the iPad as a reward or something to look forward to.

Consider Your Toddler’s Health:

• Upon takeoff and landing, children under 3 have trouble clearing their ear pressure. You can help by ensuring they over-exaggerate yawning, drink lots of water, or chew on some goldfish.
• If you’re able to, I suggest wiping down your airplane area with cleaning cloths. Wipe down the trays, arm rests, front and back of seats, window shades, etc. to protect your child from harmful germs.
• Have your toddler wash his or her hands after going through TSA.
• If the child is under 2, I recommend bringing a car seat that they’re already used to and comfortable in.
• If you are going to bring an iPad make sure you also pack a pair of headphones that are comfortable and easy for the child to use.

The bottom line is the more relaxed and prepared you are, the easier it is for the child to learn to fly.  The more you fly, the more comfortable everyone will become.

Good luck and happy parenting!

Sincerely,

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Tips for Flying with Toddlers appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

Unfortunately, bullying exists in your child’s world, but there are ways you can help. As a dad to 7 kids between the ages 9 months and 27 years old, I’ve learned the do’s and don’ts of handling schoolyard bullying.

Do: Teach your child the best ways to handle a bullying situation. If your own child is being bullied, teach them the best method is not to provoke a fight. Rather to simply and calmly (as hard as it might be) walk away and find the nearest adult (teacher or principal) who can help you. If your child is not the person being bullied but rather is witness to another child being bullied they can help by alerting a teacher or principal and being a kind and empathetic friend to the child being bullied.

Don’t: As a dad it’s hard not to want to fight a battle for your child (figuratively speaking), but do not overstep your boundaries. You could possibly make it worse for your child. If you’re a concerned parent call the school and talk with a principal or teacher and tell them the severity of the bullying situation. They’ll take the necessary measure to better watch the bully and give out consequences based on future actions.

Do: Talk! A lot! Talk to your child as much as possible about what’s going on at school, with their friends and their overall lives – you’ll be surprised by the things you’ll learn. Use the opportunity to build your child’s self-esteem as being a victim of bullying can often make a child feel puny. Discuss ways in which your child succeeds in school and at home and the things that make your child really happy. Be their rock. Build upon their strengths by giving them defense mechanisms like talking calmly, making jokes and more.

Don’t: Do nothing. Doing nothing does not work. And as a parent it’s your responsibility to do something to help your child in any situation. Be sure your moves are calculated, as your child will likely be watching and learning from your way of handling the situation.

Handling bullying can be hard, but there are ways in which parents should help by getting involved and teaching their children the best ways to handle situations. It’s important to be on the lookout for signs of bullying, and to handle each situation delicately and with dignity, as your child will be watching and learning from you.

Bottom line: teach your child to be a kind and empathetic human being who looks out for others and knows how to react and handle a bullying situation should they ever be caught in one.

Good luck and happy parenting!

Sincerely,

Daddy Nickell

Daddy Nickell, father of 7, founder of Daddyscrubs.com and the Daddyscrubs parenting blog.

The post Tips to Handle Bullying appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

School is back in service which means homework is back, too.  Getting kids to focus on their homework can be a real chore.  To help the process go a little smoother, create a homework haven for your kids. Set the scene to make it more comfortable and conducive to studying. Below are a few tips on creating a homework space that is perfect for studying.

1. Choose One Homework Space for the Kids: Designate one room or area of a room for homework and studying, rather than have the kids do homework at the kitchen table or on the couch in the living room. The kids associate the kitchen with food and the living room with socializing, games, and the TV, so this can cause confusion and distractions. Set aside a special room or area for a desk/table, homework supplies, and minimal distractions, because having a regular “homework room” will help the kids associate that area of the house with studying, which in turn will help strengthen their self-discipline and focus.

2. Stock with Essentials: Make sure the room is stocked with all necessary materials, such as lined paper, pens, pencils, a pencil sharpener, tape, scissors, etc. If you set up a computer in the homework room, ensure that it has certain Internet blocks so the kids can’t surf YouTube videos when they should be studying! Also make sure a printer stocked with paper and ink is on-hand.

3. Choose Proper Chairs: You want the chairs to be comfy but not too comfortable, as that can cause drowsiness and the kids might end up falling asleep instead of studying. Choose simple and rigid chairs that don’t swivel or roll around, because the kids might end up playing around on them instead of staying stationary and studying. Also, make sure the kids can sit on the chairs comfortably with their feet touching the ground

4. Lighting: Ensure the studying space has adequate lighting, set at a level that is not too low and not too bright. If the lighting is too low, it can cause headaches, eyestrain, and drowsiness. Too bright of lighting can cause a discomforting glare off the book pages and studying materials. Shielded, full-spectrum fluorescent lights are known to help people stay calm, steady, and focused while studying.

5. Noise Level: Ask your kids if they work better in complete silence or with “white noise” or low music, and plan the space accordingly. If your kids prefer absolutely no noise, ensure that you and your partner stay as quiet as possible during the hours of after-school studying. If the kiddos work better with low music, set up an iPod dock to play “white noise” tunes like rain or low symphonic music.

6. Snacks: The best bet is to keep all snacks and food in the kitchen and cupboard, and tell the kids to enjoy a quick snack and “brain break” in the kitchen before heading to the homework space. If snacks are within reach in the homework area, your kids might be constantly distracted from wanting to grab another juice box and granola bar! However, you can keep bottles of water on-hand in the homework room, in case the kids get thirsty.

7. Decorate the Walls in A Non-Distracting Way: Brighten up the kids’ study room with learning murals, as it will spark the kiddos’ interest and imagination in their studying. Also, make sure to hang up your kids’ artwork around the room, as this will help the kids develop pride in their work and in producing projects worthy of gold stars!

Getting kids to do their homework will never be easy but with the right “haven,” hopefully it will go a little smoother! 

Sincerely,

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents. Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Create a Homework Haven for your Kids appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

As a parent I know that for every bit of fun and enjoyment to be had with children around there’s always the possibility of consequences and necessary discipline, too. It’s the parent’s responsibility to teach their children right from wrong, as well, as how to behave, how to treat others, etc. – I know, it’s a BIG job!

With seven kids of my own ranging in age from 8 months to 27 years old, I’ve learned a thing or two about being creative when it comes to consequences and discipline.

Motivate Positively: First things first, you can try to steer your children in the right direction to avoid some unnecessary (and not-so-fun) consequences and disciplinary actions simply by motivating them positively with some sort of reward system. Sticker charts are great as are coin jars and other similar items. With this idea you’ll be able to discuss behaviors and expectations early-on, and your child will know exactly what they’ll need to do in order to earn a sticker or have a nickel deposited in their coin jar. Your children will behave while working towards a reward and at the same time learning how to be a kind and contributing member of the family.

Consequence Jar: Just as your children will be able to have a nickel added to their coin jar or a sticker to their sticker chart for behaving well, they might also have to draw a Popsicle stick from the consequence jar when they misbehave. Some ideas for this jar include: early bedtime, no television for a night, an extra chore, a timeout, etc. A substitute to the consequence jar is a consequence spinner (you can even purchase them online) wherein your child spins a wheel in order to determine their consequence instead of drawing a Popsicle stick from a jar. With this method, your child is essentially choosing his or her own consequence and you’ll be around for the follow through.

Let Them Decide: By bringing your child into the conversation and letting them help determine their consequence they’ll be able to fully contemplate the severity of their actions as well as brainstorm what kinds of consequences would be equivalent to those poor or negative actions and behaviors. Writing up a behavior contract, and having your child sign it once you decide upon a consequence you both find suitable is also a great activity and possibly a bit of a consequence in itself. After your child sits and thinks about what they did wrong, determines what their consequence will be and then writes the whole thing out to sign they’ll likely have a whole new outlook and certainly won’t be confused about what they did wrong in the first place.

Teaching your children how they’re expected to behave on a day-to-day basis is difficult, and chances are you’ll have to discipline your children for their actions a time or two before they figure things out.

Good luck and happy parenting!

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Think Outside the Box with Discipline appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

It’s back-to-school time and this time of year makes many kids feel anxious.  Some are starting school for the first time, while others have new schools, new teachers and new schedules.  Feeling anxious and nervous during this time is normal and understandable. Parents can help ease the transition of going back to school with these simple strategies.

1. Start Early.  Begin talking about school several weeks before they actually go. Create excitement about the upcoming day by taking them “back-to-school” shopping for school supplies and clothing. Get back in the rhythm of things by reading together, practicing math problems and other school like activities. Talk excitedly about school for several weeks prior. By the time they go to school, hopefully they will be in a routine and comfortable with the idea of going to school.

2. Take a tour of the school and meet teachers. Don’t skip the open house. Your child will realize they know lots of kids there and the opportunity to meet some of their teachers will greatly reduce their stress. Familiarize them with the building. Whether starting kindergarten or middle school, a new building, new hallways and new kids will cause stress to even the most veteran student.  For kids that will be switching classrooms, do a walk-through so they know their routes and won’t get lost.

3. Talk to them about bullying. Make sure they understand what it means to be a bully and to be bullied. Walk them through the steps of what to do if they or someone they know are being bullied.  Give them a safe, confidential source (school counselor, homeroom teacher, etc.) to go to if they see bullying or are bullied themselves so they know there is support available in the school as well as at home.

4.  Include a little note or treat in their lunchbox or backpack. This little gesture will make mom feel a little closer even when she’s not right there.

5.  Arrange play dates with future classmates for younger kids.  Start organizing the play dates in the summer so they have already formed some friendships before school starts.

6.  Remind them that they are not alone in their anxiety. There are plenty of children who will be feeling the same way they are, and they should talk with their friends and teachers about their feelings.

7.  Make a couple of trips to the school playground over the summer. This activity will make them feel more comfortable and look forward to recess when school starts. Find out what games are played at recess and play them with your child over the summer so he/she can confidently join in.

8.  School bus stress. The school bus might be a stressor for younger kids.  Take a few practice rides on a city bus with your child so they get a sense of what it’s like (safety rules, standing in line, not standing up when the bus is in motion, etc.).  Ask the school bus company for the route map in advance so you can drive your child through the neighborhood and point out specific landmarks, signs so they should look for so they know which stop is theirs.

9.  Be there when they get home the first day. Nothing wipes away anxiety like mom welcoming you home with a special “first day of school” treat.  Your child will realize they made it through the first day, and they had fun! Listen to their stories, encourage them to talk, keep things positive and upbeat.

Have a great school year!

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents. Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

The post Helping Kids with Back-to-School Stress appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

In just the last 24 months the term Dadchelor Party has been heard across the USA, radio, TV, and magazine articles.  A lot of new families-to-be, as well as, experienced mom’s and dad’s that already have one or more children want to know; “Is it a good thing?”, “Should we have one?”, “Is it good for my marriage?”, “Is it like a bachelor party?”, “Why are dad’s doing this?”

I have thoroughly researched the topic and in order to experience what the Dadchelor Party is truly all about, I hosted one for a friend, had one for myself and proudly hosted several Dadchelor Parties for celebrity dads, as well.  I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are fun, great for male bonding, but more than anything help push the new daddy another step forward to be ready to engage himself as either a first time dad, or an experienced dad adding a new member to his already expanding family.  I firmly believe that any event, or process that enables dad to be ready to take one more step into the family arena for birth and beyond is good for any family.

I can tell you first hand that new dads-to-be want to be involved in the process, but they are nervous, and sometimes afraid to ask questions.  Simple things like changing a diaper, or swaddling, to the more difficult task of helping to calm the new baby, or dealing with a little post-partum depression with mommy needs to be understood by dad.  After the first baby, it does seem to get easier but, as well, with each addition to the family, the dynamic changes.  I have heard mom’s and dad’s say, one baby seems like a “piece of cake” compared to having two, or even having twins.  But to the family with their first new born baby, it is a life changing and sometimes overwhelming event that truly requires a team effort.

Thus the birth of what is now known as the “Dadchelor Party.”  This is not about going to Vegas, doing shots of tequila and making improper decisions, it is about bonding with your guy friends one last time before “daddy-lock-down”, as well as, getting some good and fun “dad-advice” and information from other dad friends at the party.

First let’s look at the daddy-lock-down.  A first time dad quite often does not realize that the last month of pregnancy until the third month of life, the family unit will go into shut down mode.  First, during the last month of pregnancy, it becomes a waiting period, the Braxton Hicks (pseudo contractions) start up, the baby will normally double in size, mom has trouble walking, sitting, sleeping, and every burp causes concern about the baby.  As well, babies can come anytime once that last month starts up, so everyone has to be constantly ready to go.  The first three months of life will take some getting used to for everyone.  The first month will pass in a blur, and it will get easier after that.  For the new dad, this means a complete change in life style, going to the gym on Saturday morning, or hanging out at a Laker game during a week night needs to be put aside at least for the next four months, so the Dadchelor Party is the night to say thanks to the guys, and remind them that you will not see them for the next 120 days.  However, if dad really has some great friends, then they will set up a meal schedule and each of them take a turn at bringing over some food during the “lock down”, at least then they can say hi, offer to run an errand, or just say “hang in there”.

The other important part of the Dadchelor Party is the advice from current dads. Sometimes the most simple of questions go unanswered and become a worry.  Have you ever sat in a classroom, and wanted to ask a question, and then did not raise your hand because you thought the question was just not appropriate?  Then within a minute someone else asks the exact same question, and the teacher says “excellent question”!  Well that is where the dad-advice comes into play.  Listen up to the experienced dad’s at the party and discover that you are not alone, there are a lot of commonalities in dad’s role of raising children, going through labor and delivery, and learning how to integrate a new child into your family.  This is the time to not only hear first hand, but now to feel like you have someone you can reach out to during “daddy-lock-down”, if you need some further help or advice.

For my Dadchelor Party, we got together with about 14 dads and played Texas Hold Em’, drank some beer and wine, and I got a few “gag” gifts, as well as, some useful items.  Since I was a dad to be with number 7, I was celebrating with my guy friends and reminding them I would not see them for the next 4 months. For the Dadchelor Party I threw for a friend, we went skeet shooting, held a contest, ate BBQ, and had a few beers.  Everyone stood up, and rather than giving a toast, they gave a piece of advice, sometimes in a funny or teasing way.

There is nothing more important than getting the new or experienced dad to be engaged in the process of giving birth and having a new baby added to the family unit.  I believe that as a dad you can begin to bond with the baby in that last month before birth, and then just keep stepping up and doing whatever you can to help with the new born after birth.  Having a family is like a lot of life lessons.  “The more you put into it, the more you will get out of it”

Good luck and Happy Parenting!

Daddy Nickell

Robert Nickell, aka Daddy Nickell, father of 7, offers his “5 cents” worth of advice to expectant and new parents.  Daddy Nickell is the founder of Daddyscrubs.com, delivery room duds and daddy gifts and apparel, and the DaddyScrubs blog where he covers topics about parenting all from a Dad’s perspective.

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