“What I wonder,” I say watching my kids make Valentines cards on the kitchen table, “is what kind of genius schedules a celebration of love in the dead of winter?” 

“That genius was a priest, Dad!” my older son informs me as he opens a bag of Sweethearts—those little heart-shaped candy precursors to text messaging stamped with suggestive phrases like UR HOT, B MINE, and LETS DO LUNCH.  “Saint Valentine died on February 14th.”   

Then, after a reflective pause, he reaches for a glue stick and asks, “Dad, did you ever give someone a Valentines card when you were my age?” 

He is in middle school and I am not prepared for his question.    “Of course not,” I shoot back without thinking, “when I was your age girls had cooties.” 

My daughter looks up, startled.  “I have cooties?” she stammers. 

“No sweetie,” I reassure her. “When a boy likes a girl he says she has cooties so that he can pretend he really doesn’t like her.   Then he gets a cootie shot so he can catch the cooties he says he doesn’t want.”

“But Daddy, that’s silly.  Why would boys do that?”

“Because boys really do have cooties.” I explain. “They burrow into our heads and short circuit our brains and make us act all goofy.  Then we spend the rest of our lives trying to find a girl who doesn’t mind the fact that we have cooties and act really goofy.”

My older son scoffs: “Dad, that is the dumbest thing I have ever heard.”

I am too late.  Cooties are busy rewiring his brain and he understands that Valentines Day has more to do with birds and bees than it does with martyred saints.  “Nice card,” I say, straining to see what he has written.  “Who is it for?”

He looks surprised, like I am the kind of genius who wonders why romance is celebrated in the middle of February.  “It’s for Mom.” he says. “Who do you think it’s for?”

I smile and flip a candy heart in my mouth.  B TRUE it says.  We still have some time before the Love Birds sing.

The post The Birds and the Bugs appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

The New Year is here and so are the resolutions! Join the gym, lose weight, eat healthier, start that hobby, and I’m sure there are many others like making time to see friends and family. Well I have one for you.  How about bringing out the best in you, your teenager and your relationship???

If you’re the parent of a teenager then I’m sure you’ve experienced stress, conflict and at times feelings of complete confusion? 

Well be sure to remember you are definitely not alone and you share these experiences with all parents in one way or another!

The journey from child to teenager and the changes that occur can be quite surprising I’m sure you’ll agree (these are a surprise to your teenager too!) Are you finding that they’re breaking away and wanting to make their own decisions and choices?  This is all a part of the journey.  They’re learning who they are and who they want to become. There are many pressures and expectations in the modern teenager’s life, some of which are very apparent and some which are only found through conversation and observation. Exploring who they are and where they fit in is the main journey of a teenager’s life.

So how are we going to help them and at the same time bring out the best in both of you?  Look at this is way, as your teenager’s behaviors are changing during their transition from a child to an adult, wouldn’t it make sense to alter and enhance your parenting style too? You see, if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change! Understanding yourself and your teenager more is about recognising that they are changing and enhancing your skills and your outlook to match.  What makes this even more exciting is that you’re going to teach your teenager the most amazing life skills in the process too. It’s absolutely inspiring when you experience the results of a thriving teenager, inner peace and calm and a happier home and that’s a resolution we’d all like to guarantee.

2013 – We really can ‘Bring out the Best in Both of You!’

About Sonia Hurren

Sonia has been coaching teenagers professionally and working within multi professional teams for over 10 years; she has spent the last 6 years coaching within the education system within a wide range of schools in her home county in the UK. This last year Sonia has been facilitating teenage groups within schools, with the focus on building resilience; this was part of a nation wide pilot programme for the Department for Education (UK government dept.) The focused areas were confidence, managing challenges, emotional and life control issues and much more. http://www.soniahurren.com

The post 2013 ‘Bringing out the Best’ in Parents and Teenagers appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.