“It’s inevitable that at one time or another life will punch us hard in the gut; no one is immune to experiencing tragedy or failure,” Anderson says. “But when it’s our turn to feel life’s stomach blow, how will we handle it? Will we ‘go the extra mile’ and passionately keep on living, or will we just give up and go through the motions?”

In his interviews, Anderson learned that extra-mile people who transition positively through life’s toughest moments practice at least one of these seven regrouping strategies.

1. They don’t quit on life. “Tragedy might have happened, huge mistakes might have been made, but the world continues. People who have walked successfully over life’s hot-coal moments always keep going. They never quit living,” Anderson shares.

2. They live day-by-day. “It’s easy to get overwhelmed by the ‘What am I going to do now?’ feeling, but extra-mile people focus on the now. They don’t let thoughts of how they’re going to deal with tomorrow defeat them,” Anderson says.

3. They find support. “By forging relationships with positive, move-forward type people, survivors trigger positive energy to flow back into their lives,” Anderson points out.

4. They get involved again. “Extra-mile people transcend life’s tragedies by not choosing isolation when life knocks them down,” Anderson shares. “It’s easy to want to hide in a cave after something bad happens, but the longer we stay in the cave, the more challenging it is to ever leave it.”

5. They remain optimistic. “Extra-mile people support themselves with their own words and actions. They don’t let negative self-talk rule their brains, and they make sure not to surrender to negative, self-defeating emotions,” Anderson says.

6. They trust their faith and look for a higher purpose in their loss. “Extra-mile people believe that there is a stronger power at work in the world. Faith in a higher power…and yourself…works miracles in overcoming bad events,” Anderson quotes.

7. They seek to add value to the world. “People who have weathered a life storm recognize the opportunity to re-evaluate their own contribution to the world. They use their event not as a forever defeat, but rather as an igniting spark to do something meaningful,” Anderson says.

The author of six motivational books, including A Better Life: An Inspiring Story About Starting Over and Extra Mile America: Stories of Inspiration, Possibility and Purpose, Anderson is not only committed to support others in overcoming life’s toughest moments, he is also a leading voice on “going the extra mile” in order to maximize potential and contribution. Last year, his Extra Mile America organization led 444 cities to declare 11/1/13 as “Extra Mile Day”… a day recognizing the capacity we each have to create positive change in ourselves, families, organizations and communities when we “go the extra mile.”

“When something bad happens, we have the choice to either throw our hands in the air and give up or ‘go the extra mile’ and keep giving life our best effort. When we achieve that extra-mile distinction, we change our destiny.”

CREDIT:
Shawn Anderson is a six-time author, keynote speaker and motivational success coach. His “go the extra mile” philosophy and ability to produce results have been praised by political leaders, world record holders and media outlets across the world. His book titles include A Better Life: An Inspiring Story About Starting Over and Extra Mile America: Stories of Inspiration, Possibility and Purpose. For more information, visit www.ShawnAnderson.com.

The post 7 Strategies for Getting Up When Life Knocks You Down appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.

What overworked, overwhelmed parent hasn’t said “no” repeatedly, only to give in to a whiny, persistent child? After all, pick your battles, right? Not so fast. Saying one thing and then doing another can set you and your child up for a lifetime of unintended consequences.

What to do instead? Speak Your Truth. Get your thoughts, words and actions into alignment.

Let’s consider three repercussions when you don’t say what you mean and mean what you say.

1. Your child becomes a pest. “I already told you, the answer is no – why do you continue to ask me?” I’ll tell you why. Maybe your child has learned from an early age that if he annoys and pesters you enough, you will change your mind.

We’ve all been witness to a situation in the grocery store or toy store where some screaming child ended up getting what they wanted after we heard the parent say no numerous times. The parent, through their frustration, rewards the child for their persistence.  The problem is, that pattern doesn’t stop when a child gets older – in fact it intensifies.

As difficult as it may be, say “No” once. When the child continues to ask, say, “I’ve already given you my answer and I’m not changing my mind. Should you continue to ask, I’ll have to give you a consequence.” And then follow through. After that, don’t engage. Stay mute. I know it’s challenging but changing behaviors takes consistency and time.

2. Your child becomes high-maintenance and high drama. Have you ever watched a child throw a fit long past the terrific two’s? Show me a child who yells, screams and demands his or her way, and I’ll show you a parent whose words and actions are not the same. When a child doesn’t respect the parent’s word, they put themselves on the same playing field as the parent. This creates the opportunity for a demanding child to embrace drama to get their way.

3. Your child is less likely to act on your requests. Do you want to know why a child won’t do what you ask? The answer is simple. They don’t have to. There is no immediate consequence, because you’re inconsistent with your follow-through and discipline.

The biggest consequence of being out of alignment? You teach your child not to trust you. How can they believe that they are beautiful, special and loved when other things you say aren’t true? Give your child the confidence and esteem they need to survive and thrive in today’s world. Speak Your Truth.

Colette Carlson  is a funny human behavior expert and founder of Speak Your Truth, Inc. who learned her message the hard way. She started out as a big fat liar. Literally. Only by telling the truth on herself was she able to break through her fears, lose over 50 lbs. and take healthy risks. Today she inspires audiences as far away as South Africa, at companies such as Aflac, Cisco and PepsiCo, and within the pages of Success and Working Mother Magazines to Think It! Speak It! Live It! Maximize relationships, revenue, and results by speaking your truth in your thoughts, words, and actions. For additional articles go to www.SpeakYourTruth.com

The post The Price You Pay When You Don’t Speak Your Truth appeared first on AKAMom Magazine.